15 Comments
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Dr. Dana Leigh Lyons, DTCM's avatar

Yes! Fun looks so much different for me now... it revolves around what lights me up creatively and what leads to feeling genuinely good, not just in the moment but afterwards. Thanks for the beautiful share, Jessica!

Jessica Dueñas's avatar

Thanks for reading and sharing what lights you up! Outside of writing I definitely need to get back into other creative ventures.

Crystal C's avatar

I related to this SO much! At 3 1/2 years sober, I rarely go out anymore. I'm sure my age has something to do with it (55 years old), but It's mostly because I enjoy being home. My fun looks like walks through the neighborhood, visiting a mini horse & goat at a nearby farm, spending time with my family (& my 2 dogs!), and bike rides with my husband & friends.

Jessica Dueñas's avatar

Honestly, that sounds so rewarding. I don’t know what your drinking looked like, but for me, it’s a big deal to enjoy being at home because there was a time I couldn’t stand being at home and drank the moment I walked through the front door.

Sue McWilliams's avatar

I remember when I first got sober, and my "best friend" was my drinking buddy, and I went out for the first time. We went to a bar because that is what we did. It was the most uncomfortable moment. I knew that this was not going to work for me. I am so glad I realized it quickly, because I'm pretty sure I would have picked up a drink.

Jessica Dueñas's avatar

For sure, we really get faced with tough decisions early on sometimes. Glad to read that you navigated supporting your sobriety!

Tahmid's avatar

So true for early sobriety. I learnt the same.

Jessica Dueñas's avatar

Such a valuable lesson to pick up!

Christopher Manson's avatar

I wouldn't trade my boring sober life for anything.

Jessica Dueñas's avatar

Amen to that!

Just The One's avatar

👏👏 There’s a grief in discovering you only knew how to feel socially valuable in environments that were quietly hurting you.

Jessica Dueñas's avatar

For sure, and while there’s the heaviness that comes with that awareness, it’s also a gift to come to see where we don’t belong and, as a result, be able to choose differently.🙏🏽

Hungover Wasn’t a Personality's avatar

I’m very early in my journey (16 days) but here’s happiness I have found so far 😀

* Early morning coffees

* walks with the dog, nature and sunshine

* Laughing properly with friends instead of fuzzy half-memories

* Cooking good food

* Craft projects, painting, upcycling, reading in peace

Beth R.'s avatar

I just started my sober journey over again today. Your story inspired me. I can really identify with understanding what fun could look like it I really be ame observant of what I'm doing and how it actually makes me feel.