I'm paraphrasing 'cause it was a long time ago, but an old-timer told me “If you do the work, you can emerge a completely different person. Your old normal can be replaced by a life of almost limitless potential.” He seemed to be living the kind of life I aspired to and his advice inspired me to stop trying to hack the program and get serious about doing the work. He was absolutely spot on!
I would say that you should be aware that it can be a little tough sitting with yourself and your thoughts in the 2nd month. The first month is great because you’re experiencing the high of quitting, but you can feel a little bit ‘What now?’ in the next phase. When this happens, take yourself off to a quiet place, the car, the park, anywhere quiet and let the sensation pass. Trust me, it’s worth getting over the hurdle, as this fades with time.
I wish I had heard people say hang in there with the support group - whatever it is. Share. Be as vulnerable as you can. That’s where you’ll find connection. Your brain will focus on every reason not to be there and how different you are. In time you’ll find out you have so much in common and the support from fellow sojourners is priceless.
Keep going. If you have decided you want to be sober, keep going. If you drink again, if you feel down, if you have dark days, keep going. A sober life has been the best decision I've ever made - and opened up so many doors for better health - mentally, emotionally, physically - When I started this journey some years ago, I never could have seen the life I have now - the beauty of it. So, my advice to someone considering it or starting out - keep going.
Thursday Mar 26 is mile marker 44 years. So yes, getting sober AND staying sober is doable. I entered via AA, which then opened a universe full of answers to my deepest questions. Quickly learned that drinking wasn't the problem; thinking was. Handed meditation as something to address the thinking problem. Still sit in the rooms on a regular basis as they feed that element of collectiveness and service, which gets me out of my thinking. One day at a time.
When you get newly sober, either in a rehab or on your own through a fellowship or quit lit or whatever, you can feel like you've been given a list of boxes to check off. If something doesn't work for you, don't check it off--cross it off. Check off what does work and stick with it. We each have our own path to walk, our own journey. Sober is a much better way to go through life.
If I may, I stumbled upon this this morning likely because I just posted a whole long article on this topic and would like to share it. It is not my usual topic, but I recently gained 15 years of sobriety after an IV heroin addiction and bouts of struggles with alcohol as well. In honor of this, I wrote 15 thoughts on sobriety from 15 years sober here, focusing on both practical tips and also more philosophical ideas (like the Ancient Greek concepts of akrasia-acting against one’s own better judgement and enkrateia-self mastery):
Thanks for your beautiful shares, everyone! ❤️
I'm paraphrasing 'cause it was a long time ago, but an old-timer told me “If you do the work, you can emerge a completely different person. Your old normal can be replaced by a life of almost limitless potential.” He seemed to be living the kind of life I aspired to and his advice inspired me to stop trying to hack the program and get serious about doing the work. He was absolutely spot on!
Thanks for sharing, Steve!
I would say that you should be aware that it can be a little tough sitting with yourself and your thoughts in the 2nd month. The first month is great because you’re experiencing the high of quitting, but you can feel a little bit ‘What now?’ in the next phase. When this happens, take yourself off to a quiet place, the car, the park, anywhere quiet and let the sensation pass. Trust me, it’s worth getting over the hurdle, as this fades with time.
Such great advice, Philip.
I wish I had heard people say hang in there with the support group - whatever it is. Share. Be as vulnerable as you can. That’s where you’ll find connection. Your brain will focus on every reason not to be there and how different you are. In time you’ll find out you have so much in common and the support from fellow sojourners is priceless.
❤️
Keep going. If you have decided you want to be sober, keep going. If you drink again, if you feel down, if you have dark days, keep going. A sober life has been the best decision I've ever made - and opened up so many doors for better health - mentally, emotionally, physically - When I started this journey some years ago, I never could have seen the life I have now - the beauty of it. So, my advice to someone considering it or starting out - keep going.
Beautiful, Andy! Thank you for sharing.
Making amends is a selfish endeavor. If it is sincere, the recipient's reaction matters not.
Thanks for sharing, Bruce. Making amends truly is powerful and transformative.
Thursday Mar 26 is mile marker 44 years. So yes, getting sober AND staying sober is doable. I entered via AA, which then opened a universe full of answers to my deepest questions. Quickly learned that drinking wasn't the problem; thinking was. Handed meditation as something to address the thinking problem. Still sit in the rooms on a regular basis as they feed that element of collectiveness and service, which gets me out of my thinking. One day at a time.
Thanks so much for sharing, Jon. 44 years!
When you get newly sober, either in a rehab or on your own through a fellowship or quit lit or whatever, you can feel like you've been given a list of boxes to check off. If something doesn't work for you, don't check it off--cross it off. Check off what does work and stick with it. We each have our own path to walk, our own journey. Sober is a much better way to go through life.
Thanks so much for sharing, John.
All encouraging and hope provoking advice. Thanks for posting this, Dana.
Thanks for sharing and being here!
11 yrs sober,much better life
Congrats on 11 years, Joe!
Thank you! I’ve just attended my best meeting in a long time by reading this 🙏
Thanks so much for being here, Dee 🙏
Love these posts, Dana. Thank you for including me ❤️
And thank you to everyone else who shared advice!! I wish I could've found a page like this when I was getting sober! Invaluable.
Thanks so much for being here, Kaitlyn ❤️
I wrote all about this today!:
https://theworkofwomen.substack.com/p/the-womens-work-guide-to-sobriety?r=1ljam1&utm_medium=ios
If I may, I stumbled upon this this morning likely because I just posted a whole long article on this topic and would like to share it. It is not my usual topic, but I recently gained 15 years of sobriety after an IV heroin addiction and bouts of struggles with alcohol as well. In honor of this, I wrote 15 thoughts on sobriety from 15 years sober here, focusing on both practical tips and also more philosophical ideas (like the Ancient Greek concepts of akrasia-acting against one’s own better judgement and enkrateia-self mastery):
https://theworkofwomen.substack.com/p/the-womens-work-guide-to-sobriety?r=1ljam1&utm_medium=ios