39 Comments
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Dr. Dana Leigh Lyons, DTCM's avatar

Sending love, care, recognition, and gratitude to you, Maria. I have no doubt your brother is extra proud ❤️

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Thank you for the work you do, Dana! It keeps us all on the path 💞

ayse's avatar

💫💗🙌🫶🙏 bravo for your awesome story… It sounds very similar to my journey… My sympathies for the loss of your brother… And yes, your brother is very proud of you 👏 I remember one thing that got my attention out of all the moments I spent at a rehab facility to get sober, was a 34-year-old came to speak to our class with his wife and daughter who was like four and he said he had a few months to live because his liver had started to fail because he kept going back to drinking… Thank you for an excellent read! God bless you!

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Ayse, thank you for reading my story and sharing about this man's story and the impact it had on your recovery. Nice work on your sobriety, and thank you again!! Blessings💗

ayse's avatar

I truly am inspired by your story. It helps me remain sober. Thank you 😊

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

You are most welcome!

Mary Slater's avatar

Thanks for this, Maria. Like you, I understand what it’s like to put on a flawless façade while quietly wrestling with pain underneath.

For much of my life, I hid my vulnerabilities behind a shiny mask of perfection. I covered up, afraid of being rejected if anyone saw the real me. I tried to outrun my shame through perfectionism, hoping that by people-pleasing, performing, and proving myself, I could keep others from looking too closely. But beneath the surface, the struggle was always there.

Your article is a powerful reminder that real connection happens when we stop performing and show up as our true selves. I’m so sorry your younger brother didn’t survive the struggle. 💜🙌🏻

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Thank you for taking the time to share, Mary, and I am grateful we are giving some fresh air to this trap that so many people become stuck in.

And thank you about my brother, too. It means so much to be witnessed, especially by those who understand the struggle.

Mary Slater's avatar

You’re welcome, Maria. I also lost a brother—my oldest—so I can relate to you on many levels. ❤️🤗

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Oh I am sorry about your brother, Mary 💔

Sue McWilliams's avatar

Thank you for your story. It's crazy how we can seem to fool ourselves into thinking we don't have a problem with alcohol because we "can" raise a family, go to work, and appear successful.

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

You are welcome! And I hear you!

Kelly Thompson TNWWY's avatar

So powerful when we drop the performance! Kudos!

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Many thanks for the kudos! I am so grateful I was able to finally quit.

Kelly Thompson TNWWY's avatar

🙌🏼

Tammy Roth's avatar

Oh gosh 💔thank you for so freely sharing your story and I am so sorry your brother didn’t make it out … so heartbreaking.

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Aww thank you, sister!

Karen Duarte's avatar

Thanks for your words. They really helped me stay sober in these challenging times. Reminded me where I’ve been and I don’t want to go back there. Sorry for your brother. This addiction is brutal

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Aww, Karen, I totally agree on both counts. It is sooo brutal and I never want to go back to that life. Take care!

Payton Kennedy's avatar

Love this piece Maria. So many (I know) are so grateful for your recovery journey. ❤️

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Thank you for being a light in the recovery space, Payton ❣️

Doreen Frances's avatar

Thank you for sharing your experience, strength, and hope, Maria.

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

You are most welcome, Doreen! I really needed these stories when I was getting sober and newly sober (heck, I still need them!), and I hope they help people.

Jayme Bednarczyk's avatar

Thank you… so beautifully written. Will be sharing… just came from a celebration of life for my Brother In Law who was a functioning alcoholic.

Continue to thrive and write!

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Jayme, I am sorry for the loss of your brother-in-law 💔

Thank you for your kindness!

Barb Natividad 🇵🇭🇺🇸's avatar

Maria, thank you for sharing your story. You are so brave to be on this journey. I’m proud of you! 💖

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Thank you so much, Barb. I appreciate you 💗

Crystal C's avatar

I'm so very sorry for the loss of your brother, Maria. Parts of our stories are so similar! I ended up in the ER, too, but mine was with a stroke. It was 2020 & I was 48 years old. Nobody (all kinds of doctors) could figure out why. I was healthy in every other way... except my abuse of alcohol. I'm sure deep down that alcohol had to play a part. Plus, I was on day 5 of a detox after the holidays. Withdrawal? Maybe, but the doctors said it wasn't alcohol-related. We'll never know. It took me 2 1/2 years to get sober after that. My sobriety date is November 14, 2022. I'm excited to celebrate 4 years in November, and it sounds like you'll be celebrating with me! Thank you for sharing your story. Never again will I allow alcohol to steal my joy.

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Wow, Crystal, how scary! I am glad you got better and got sober, too. My sobriety date is Nov 4, 2022, so yes, we are nearly sober twins 💞

MaryBeth Murphy's avatar

Thank you for sharing your story with us. I’m so glad to have met you on this path. Sending love and condolences on your brother’s death. Recovering out loud is a brave and potent antidote to addiction. Perhaps someone will resonate and take the leap to this side! His death is not in vain.🙏💜

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

I’m so glad we met, too, MaryBeth! Thank you for saying my brother's death is not in vain. I know he wishes others wouldn't suffer as he did. 💔

Claire | You Only Age Once's avatar

Well done, I am really happy to have not drunk any alcohol for one year.

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Congratulations, Claire! That's amazing work 🙌🏽

Beth Feagan's avatar

I stopped drinking on April 1, 2023, in solidarity with my son who is in recovery from alcoholism. I quickly discovered my sobriety felt amazing in my body mind, and my own recovery began in earnest. What began as a gesture of support (I always wanted my kiddo to have a sober buddy to talk to 24/7) became a journey of investigation into my unhealthy attachment to alcohol. I started a local chapter of Recovery Dharma to create a community of support and care for myself and others. We've been going strong for 1.5 years now, and I'm grateful. Thanks for sharing your story, Maria. One thing I've learned in the last few years is our vulnerability is our superpower. I appreciate your courage in telling your story. Love and strength to you ~~

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Beth, it is wonderful to hear about you and your son, and what sounds like a calling being awakened in you, which is now serving others. How beautiful!

Maggie Delaney-Potthoff's avatar

Brilliant, Maria. And brave. Your brother’s love must vibrate within you from head to toe.

Maria Luz O'Rourke's avatar

Thank you Maggie 💞