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Dana Leigh Lyons's avatar

This rings so true. Ultimately, we are the only ones who can choose to get and stay sober - no one can do it for us, and we have to want it more than the alternative. Thank you for sharing so beautifully, Kimberly!

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Kimberly Kearns's avatar

Thank you, Dana! And thanks for letting me share, as always.

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JustJade25's avatar

Gosh that took me back to that realisation that I had evolved and shifted in what I realised was self love ❤️ I had changed and my old using/drinking buddies were no longer as important as saving my own soul. I used/drank differently to them. I couldn't stop once I'd started, to blackout. I'd become the nightmare at the party!

My old friendships slipped away, and I was OK with that. Because that hole in my soul I was using/drinking to fill, wasn't doing what it said on the tin anymore. I was cornered! My willingness came when I'd also as you mentioned, I had no more excuses, no one else to blame but look inwards. Deep transformation and growth followed. Out of the stagnation and pollution and into the solution!

Freedom from thoes chains, having my mind back and choices, being unblocked with free flowing love and compassion for my past self today. It feels awsome 💖

4 years sobriety and I do still go raving from time to time. But I know what 1 hit/fix/pill/snort or drink of alcohol will do to me today. So I hug myself and say nope thank you, I love myself, my family and my life today!! ❤️

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Kimberly Kearns's avatar

Self love was something I’d been missing for a long time. And it took a while to discover that. And being able to show compassion for myself has been one of the hardest aspects of sobriety but one of the most fulfilling. Happy you found your freedom too, Jade. 🩷

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Dee Rambeau's avatar

Thanks for sharing part of your story here. 🙏

I’ve found a huge clarity around want vs. need. Many people need to get sober yet will continue to do what they want to instead. Without alignment between want and need there is no recovery. Maybe we stop drinking but we don’t recover.

Willingness becomes the foundation of long-term recovery. Willing to look at ourselves. Wiling to do things differently—to think differently.

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Kimberly Kearns's avatar

Yes! I love that - the foundation for long term recovery. Thank you!

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Allison Deraney's avatar

Loved this Kim!

And yes, it’s an inside job. I relate so much to that. Despite so many outside forces, distractions and noise, the work (MY work) is mine and mine alone.

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Kimberly Kearns's avatar

Thanks, Allison! Yes. Inside job and ours alone - but we need to be willing to let go of what held us down.

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Jim Savage's avatar

Thanks so much for sharing this. As far as what made me become willing—I always refer to it as grace I don't know how it happened, because it was not my default setting. I was standing in the backyard after the family had organized an intervention. A friend said, "Jim, you're sick, and you deserve to be taken care of." I had never considered that angle before, and something happened at that moment, andI just said, "OK, I'll go." (And it was gonna be bad—my relapse had created a public scandal...)

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Kimberly Kearns's avatar

"you deserve to be taken care of" - beautiful. thanks for sharing.

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HollyA's avatar

You look so healthy & happy!

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Kimberly Kearns's avatar

Aww well thanks 😊

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swills2007's avatar

I'm in tears. Thank u for this ❤️

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Kimberly Kearns's avatar

Thank you ☺️

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Adrienne's avatar

Wow 😮 that was amazing reading. It certainly reminds me of the need for internal willingness to beat this monster 👿. Nothing on the outside will fix us without total internal commitment. Thank you 🙏 so much for sharing and keep going forward.

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